“5…4…3…2…1… happy new year! – Oh no, this is not the time! It is 23: 59!” There is always a. A small phrase launched by-ci by-there, mine of nothing, which breaks the atmosphere. A note on the meals, work, love or cherry on the log, the policy. That has never raised the tone to be argued in front of an audience gathered once a year? To talk about everything and most of all… for nothing? So, to avoid that your holiday turns sour, Le Figaro offers an overview of these formulas to forget during the celebration of the end of the year.

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And it begins before the meal. At the moment when you leave work, and our colleagues, we are launching a “see you next year!” . The moment one crosses the threshold of the house where we will celebrate the new year. While we we wipe the feet on the doormat, hang our coat, we cross our first guests. Hey! The great-uncle that we haven’t seen for a long time. “what you have become since last year?” Thorny issue! How to summarize a life of twelve months in a sentence? And then heard by the verb, “become”? The Trésor de la Language française defines it thus: “to Be engaged in an evolutionary process that will lead to a change of state.” Gold, how to say what one becomes when he or she is in full become? Let’s move on.

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The small furnaces ready, the family is complete. It remains only to find his glass and discuss. The hostilities can begin: “ what are your resolutions this time? You’ll finally stop smoking?”, launching a guest. “And you, you are not talking about a diet, in the last year?” retorted another. The resolution comes from ‘resolve’ means “to find, through a process of analysis and reflection, the solution of a difficulty”. Only here, as written by Alexandre Dumas fils: “resolutions are like eels ; they are easily takes. The devil is to keep them up.”

The appetizer barely digested, it is time now to move to table. The small and the great of the other. The mistress of the house has cleverly placed its guests. The new generations live alongside older ones. Orange juice and champagne for the latter. It was then that someone is a coward: “Mmm… it’s gross, you’re certain? Not because I know a little and…” Nothing is less charming than the criticism of a drink offered or a meal prepared. Accordingly, it is strongly advised not to discuss the talents of the master chef. Again, there’s always one who dares: “ The turkey is a little dry . It is better when it is stuffed, anyway!”

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Salmon, turkey, scallops, mashed potatoes, mushrooms… and the inevitable foie gras. You enjoy it, it’s not every day that such a culinary specialty appears on your plate. Your neighbor has the annoyed look. While you wear your fork to the mouth, he says: “You’ve seen the images of the force-feeding of geese to the tv?” All the heads turn. “I warn you, I don avalerai not a gram of fatty liver ! A little bit of humanity, good blood!”, he says solemnly. There is nothing better to make us feel bad… But luckily, grandma has planned the coup: all the tastes are permitted at the table.

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Between bites, the crowd then speaks of culture, sports, economy, and necessarily, political. “ And you, you’ve thought about what the yellow vests? do You agree with our president?”. The conversation can only get worse. Similarly, there is an infallible rule to not break under any circumstances: questions ending with ” you’re for or you’re against it? ” Dispute ensured.

Place the dessert: a fabulous log of chocolate and its red fruit coulis. We give in to the temptation and, sorry if this is too good, it is used a second time. “ You want another piece of cake? Are you sure? ” If this is happening to us, let us be sincere and quote La Rochefoucauld: “Love the chocolate at the bottom, without complexes or false shame, because remember: “without a grain of madness, he is not of the reasonable man””.

the stroke of Midnight finally, the whole world is standing up for a toast. Good health, work, success, and… love. The couples kiss. All or almost all. “ Your wife is the new year in his family? ” note a guest. “You are no longer together?” Delicate attention. This is an unpleasant way to start 2019. So, dear readers, you have been warned. On the evening of the new year is always a minefield.

The Pen of Figaro wishes you a happy new year and thank you for your loyalty.

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